When I left West Marin in November of 2010, it was with trepidation that I moved out into the world of the unemployed. However, I have never looked back on that decision to leave because I firmly believe that some of us were not made to stay put for so long. I had lived in Inverness for more than 20 years and the beauty and safety of that place were so seductive as to become a snare, a beautiful trap. It was time for me to leave, although I didn't realize that until after the fact. Would I move back? No.
However, I am back there on Monday and Tuesday mornings, working for Tom at the inn. He needs a break and I need diversion and money. It's a job I know well, I am a known entity to him and we like each other enough to pass through the boss-employee membrane with no side effects.
Driving there in the morning, early, is delicious right now. It is so green it defies the word "green." It defies the word "verdant" and any other word you can use to describe rolling hills oozing fresh vegetation. There are baby cows (hmm, I think they are called calves) jumping around in fields, black crows like shiny Maltese Falcons in contrast with the green grass, wildflowers of yellow, orange, blue, red. Postcard vistas. A flat, straight band of fog like a child's lost hair ribbon laying over a dip in the hills. The drive is the pay-off for getting up early and leaving before coffee.
Then, when work is over, I drive back to Petaluma and over to Sonoma and to my other job for the afternoon shift and I see some of the same but a lot of different as well. Lines and lines of vines. Beautifully plowed hills, rows like cables cut into the ground. And has there been a year when the poppies have been this beautiful and prolific? Poppies under the vines, poppies on hillsides, along the roadside, freckling the green fields. It can only make you smile, the guilelessness of nature.
But back in Point Reyes Station: I was in the Palace Market, buying groceries for the inn, and I encountered two men who I sort of knew from living there. Just random acquaintances, not friends, and they both remarked "Hey, I haven't seen you in years!" as if I had been hiding in my house, just waiting to pop out when the time was right! Not questions about where I live or if I moved or any such thing, but just that THEY hadn't seen ME. It struck me so, so West Marinish and in a way that I can't even explain.
So, not really a prodigal returning to Point Reyes, more a sorry pilgrim on the work road but enjoying the view at the same time.
.
Wednesday, April 30, 2014
Saturday, April 26, 2014
One more week gone, how does that happen?
Honestly, I have very good intentions about writing here on this blog page every other day. I want to write every other day, I mean to do so and then I look and WHAM! Another week has gone by with nary a word written on this page. It saddens me because it means all my good intentions have vanished into nothingness. It isn't like my life is so exciting that I am out dancing into the wee hours and creating amazing art and planting an extraordinary garden and helping young delinquent children find their path of righteousness and feeding the homeless nutritious yet inexpensive meals made from food I have gleaned from some unsuspecting neighbor's garden. None of those things have I done this week. (If I had, you can bet I would have written about it.)
So, once again, I will pledge to write more often, even if it is about the boring and mundane, which it will be because such is my life most of the time. But write I will. Even if I have to make up something so outlandish that even I won't believe it, I will do so.
At least I will try.
So, once again, I will pledge to write more often, even if it is about the boring and mundane, which it will be because such is my life most of the time. But write I will. Even if I have to make up something so outlandish that even I won't believe it, I will do so.
At least I will try.
Saturday, April 19, 2014
Class, race and cultures collide
In a powerful new book, "Americanah" by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, the struggles between cultures and countries, classes and race are so clearly defined and presented, that you, the reader, are drawn into these conflicts in an almost personal way. The main character, Ifemelu, is born and raised in Nigeria but leaves Africa for America in her early 20's, longing to live in a free country where she can go to college and become a success, no matter how vague that seems at the start. She is strong-willed and determined but is almost undermined by the clash of her culture of blackness and that of the black culture in America. It certainly isn't what she imagined.
There is an on-going discussion of what makes an "African-American" and an "American-African" and how they are so disparate. That a black person from Africa can feel so out of place as a black person in America isn't something I had ever thought about. But why would I? It isn't my experience. But through this book, through Adichie's incredible delineation of character, even a 60 + year old white woman can begin to see a tiny part of the struggle every black person must go through, whether from Africa or from America or from anywhere else.
This is a powerful book but it is also a compelling read. The story spans about 20 years and three continents but it is never slow or boring and is always challenging. The dialogue seems spot on, the relationships, even when very difficult, seem very real. Ifemelu is a person you would like to know, someone who would be a tough friend but a smart one. Her journey to the US and eventually back to Africa mirrors all of our journeys through life, small and large. But this doesn't mean her experiences are like ours. On the contrary.
This is a very, very good book, one of the best novels I have read in a long time. It feels incredibly real. I look forward to reading more of Adichie's writings very soon.
There is an on-going discussion of what makes an "African-American" and an "American-African" and how they are so disparate. That a black person from Africa can feel so out of place as a black person in America isn't something I had ever thought about. But why would I? It isn't my experience. But through this book, through Adichie's incredible delineation of character, even a 60 + year old white woman can begin to see a tiny part of the struggle every black person must go through, whether from Africa or from America or from anywhere else.
This is a powerful book but it is also a compelling read. The story spans about 20 years and three continents but it is never slow or boring and is always challenging. The dialogue seems spot on, the relationships, even when very difficult, seem very real. Ifemelu is a person you would like to know, someone who would be a tough friend but a smart one. Her journey to the US and eventually back to Africa mirrors all of our journeys through life, small and large. But this doesn't mean her experiences are like ours. On the contrary.
This is a very, very good book, one of the best novels I have read in a long time. It feels incredibly real. I look forward to reading more of Adichie's writings very soon.
Thursday, April 17, 2014
Who doesn't love Wes Anderson movies?
OK, if you don't like his movies, then you might be old and have lost your sense of wonderous humor. Or you are young and too careful and worried about laughing out loud. Wes Anderson makes movies that have a serious premise but are not really serious. They're funny but also goofy and charming and a tiny bit mean and evil and they always have a cast that we all love. Even in small, cameo performances, his regular stable of thoroughbreds is amazing: Bill Murray, Owen Wilson, Edward Norton, Jude Law, Willem DeFoe, and on and on. His credits include "Rushmore" from years ago, "Life Aquatic (with Steve Zuzou)" and the recent "Moonrise Kingdom" which is such a sweet love story and yet laugh out loud funny at the same time and a little off balanced.
His latest movie is "The Grand Budapest Hotel" which you must see. It's perfect. A simple tale of love, betrayal, trust, power, deceit, death and snow. Whenever it seems to be getting a tiny bit slow, something outrageous happens. Whenever you think it is getting a little too over the top, it gets more over that same top but at the same time it seems almost .... normal. Things speed up, they slow down, they make sense and then they don't. It is very, very good.
Wes Anderson's movies always have things moving in them, trains or cars or people on skis. People walk in single file down a hallway or across a field, and they walk quickly. There are probably recurring themes like death and taxes and betrayal but I never delve too deeply into those esoteric realms. I just laugh out loud and sometimes cringe a little and often, especially at the end, I sometimes get a little teary.
His sets are amazing. Old buildings, old hotels in this case, wood paneled rooms, boats, trains. The attention to detail is so precise as to seem 100% authentic but it's a movie so you know it isn't. The music is always perfect, lots of odd instrumentals and symphonic sounds but also simple banjo music when necessary.
"The Grand Budapest Hotel" is about a hotel concierge who is a liar and a lady's man, a bit of a con man and a trusted friend. Ralph Finnes is perfect as is his cast of supporting characters. Seriously, for a good time, go see this movie. See it on the big screen. When the theater darkens, as the movie begins, suspend belief in the mundane, in the practical and the pragmatic. Let it take you along. It's a very fun ride.
His latest movie is "The Grand Budapest Hotel" which you must see. It's perfect. A simple tale of love, betrayal, trust, power, deceit, death and snow. Whenever it seems to be getting a tiny bit slow, something outrageous happens. Whenever you think it is getting a little too over the top, it gets more over that same top but at the same time it seems almost .... normal. Things speed up, they slow down, they make sense and then they don't. It is very, very good.
Wes Anderson's movies always have things moving in them, trains or cars or people on skis. People walk in single file down a hallway or across a field, and they walk quickly. There are probably recurring themes like death and taxes and betrayal but I never delve too deeply into those esoteric realms. I just laugh out loud and sometimes cringe a little and often, especially at the end, I sometimes get a little teary.
His sets are amazing. Old buildings, old hotels in this case, wood paneled rooms, boats, trains. The attention to detail is so precise as to seem 100% authentic but it's a movie so you know it isn't. The music is always perfect, lots of odd instrumentals and symphonic sounds but also simple banjo music when necessary.
"The Grand Budapest Hotel" is about a hotel concierge who is a liar and a lady's man, a bit of a con man and a trusted friend. Ralph Finnes is perfect as is his cast of supporting characters. Seriously, for a good time, go see this movie. See it on the big screen. When the theater darkens, as the movie begins, suspend belief in the mundane, in the practical and the pragmatic. Let it take you along. It's a very fun ride.
Tuesday, April 15, 2014
Laptops and Tablets and Cameras, oh my!
Before the day got too old, I made myself go to Best Buy yesterday to look at new technology. (If I wait too long in the day, I talk myself out of it, so if I am not at the BB door by 10:15, forgetaboutit.) New technology to me means anything newer than what I now have, which is a borrowed, old (at least 6 years) and very basic laptop. It only works plugged in (no battery power), won't accept certain links to other sites, has some keys that often won't type (like the letter 'm' and 'd') and is generally annoyingly acceptable in its usefulness. It reluctantly lets me get online, lets me check email, write a blog, google things but it is very slow and very old. I think it has a form of computer dementia, and sometimes forgets that it is my tool to the online world. It will simply say 'no' at random times, refusing to access a site that it happily found the day before. Temperamental and old. Sounds vaguely familiar, actually, in a sadly personal way.
So into Best Buy I ventured. It was overwhelming. Station after station of shiny new electronic equipment. I thought I might want to get a tablet instead of a laptop but there were so many of both species that I quickly became like a zombie, eyes glazed over, fingers held out in front of my body, gingerly touching some of the shiny objects, moving to the next one, making small ferret-like sounds. At least I wasn't drooling. At least, I hope I wasn't drooling.
Too many choices and not enough facts to know what to do with all those choices. For example, two identical Samsung tablets right next to each other, $100 difference in the price and the only thing I could see that differentiated the two was one letter in their model number. What does that mean? For what I want, does it mean anything at all? Who can tell me the answers to these kind of questions? One BB Geek salesperson came over, hesitantly, and asked "Do you have any questions?" When I answered "I have too many questions, actually" he edged away quickly. (I figured he was the new guy. The other salesmen obviously could read my technologically deficient aura and stayed aisles away from me.)
The Apple products were the most alluring but the most expensive as well. But in other makes and models, there were lovely looking laptops for under $400 and equally lovely ones for $1400. Tablets, the same. In a daze, I just walked around and around the displays until I just couldn't look any longer.
I walked over to the camera section because I currently do not have a camera and I want one. Something small, cheap, efficient and uncomplicated. They had small and cheap, that's for sure. And larger and expensive as well, of course. But there were so many! Dozens and in all colors. I realized that I needed to do a little research on cameras before I bought one, but then I thought "Why? Does it really matter? I am not looking to be Ansel Adams, just pick one up and buy it!" But I couldn't. Not just yet.
Right now, Tuesday morning, it isn't 10:00 in the morning yet, so I still have time to take a shower and go back to BB and actually buy something. I might..... it will be a small and cheap camera. I am not ready for the plunge into the computer/tablet purchase yet. Maybe the camera will be like a gateway drug, one that will lead me to another, more substantial purchase.
One can only hope.
UPDATE: Without taking a shower or leaving my house, I bought a small, cheap camera! Amazon had one that was recommended, with tax it's less than $90.00 and I didn't even need to talk to a Geek salesperson! What a sense of relief. Of course, now I need a new computer/laptop/tablet so I can post some of the outstanding photos that I will be taking, because this old demented computer does not like cameras or photos or uploading or processing anything other than a few keystrokes. But hey, it will happen! I have new confidence. HA!
So into Best Buy I ventured. It was overwhelming. Station after station of shiny new electronic equipment. I thought I might want to get a tablet instead of a laptop but there were so many of both species that I quickly became like a zombie, eyes glazed over, fingers held out in front of my body, gingerly touching some of the shiny objects, moving to the next one, making small ferret-like sounds. At least I wasn't drooling. At least, I hope I wasn't drooling.
Too many choices and not enough facts to know what to do with all those choices. For example, two identical Samsung tablets right next to each other, $100 difference in the price and the only thing I could see that differentiated the two was one letter in their model number. What does that mean? For what I want, does it mean anything at all? Who can tell me the answers to these kind of questions? One BB Geek salesperson came over, hesitantly, and asked "Do you have any questions?" When I answered "I have too many questions, actually" he edged away quickly. (I figured he was the new guy. The other salesmen obviously could read my technologically deficient aura and stayed aisles away from me.)
The Apple products were the most alluring but the most expensive as well. But in other makes and models, there were lovely looking laptops for under $400 and equally lovely ones for $1400. Tablets, the same. In a daze, I just walked around and around the displays until I just couldn't look any longer.
I walked over to the camera section because I currently do not have a camera and I want one. Something small, cheap, efficient and uncomplicated. They had small and cheap, that's for sure. And larger and expensive as well, of course. But there were so many! Dozens and in all colors. I realized that I needed to do a little research on cameras before I bought one, but then I thought "Why? Does it really matter? I am not looking to be Ansel Adams, just pick one up and buy it!" But I couldn't. Not just yet.
Right now, Tuesday morning, it isn't 10:00 in the morning yet, so I still have time to take a shower and go back to BB and actually buy something. I might..... it will be a small and cheap camera. I am not ready for the plunge into the computer/tablet purchase yet. Maybe the camera will be like a gateway drug, one that will lead me to another, more substantial purchase.
One can only hope.
UPDATE: Without taking a shower or leaving my house, I bought a small, cheap camera! Amazon had one that was recommended, with tax it's less than $90.00 and I didn't even need to talk to a Geek salesperson! What a sense of relief. Of course, now I need a new computer/laptop/tablet so I can post some of the outstanding photos that I will be taking, because this old demented computer does not like cameras or photos or uploading or processing anything other than a few keystrokes. But hey, it will happen! I have new confidence. HA!
Saturday, April 12, 2014
Writers Blahs: Suffering from ADD
So, no writer's block here, just writer's blahs. That's why there has been nothing for more than a week. Just got the blahs, the boring state of ennui has taken hold and won't let go. It's too bad. I want to write, but nothing sounds even moderately appealing. And if it there is no appeal, what's the point.
I think I have ADD. Not the attention deficit thing. This is more like Adult Destiny Distress. What am I supposed to be doing? Is this it? Is this my destiny, after almost 64 years, to be working in a fancy boutique hotel, being nice all the time to strangers, struggling to balance my expenses with the small income every month, living with the wrong roommate, facing five more years of this easy yet unchallenging job, all the while becoming more and more pissed off at myself for being in this predicament when all I really want to do is travel. I know, lots of us just want to travel and don't want to work all the time, I am not special in this. I just don't want to be here anymore.
Sigh. Whine. Awful Demon Dance. Got to get these demons out of my head, got to get on track somehow, got to do something to move this life forward instead of feeling stuck in the LaBrea tar pits every day. What to do? Don't know but I better figure it out quickly.
I think I have ADD. Not the attention deficit thing. This is more like Adult Destiny Distress. What am I supposed to be doing? Is this it? Is this my destiny, after almost 64 years, to be working in a fancy boutique hotel, being nice all the time to strangers, struggling to balance my expenses with the small income every month, living with the wrong roommate, facing five more years of this easy yet unchallenging job, all the while becoming more and more pissed off at myself for being in this predicament when all I really want to do is travel. I know, lots of us just want to travel and don't want to work all the time, I am not special in this. I just don't want to be here anymore.
Sigh. Whine. Awful Demon Dance. Got to get these demons out of my head, got to get on track somehow, got to do something to move this life forward instead of feeling stuck in the LaBrea tar pits every day. What to do? Don't know but I better figure it out quickly.
Thursday, April 3, 2014
Movies Galore!
Four movies under my belt this week, thanks to DVDs from the library. Check them out. In no particular order:
The Great Gatsby. This is the new one from 2013 with Leonardo DiCaprio, directed by Baz Luhrmann. If you know anything about Baz Luhrmann's direction (Moulin Rouge, Australia) you know that he goes in for the theatrical, the visually intriguing, the "over the top" details. He spares nothing in this version of the story of Jay Gatsby, millionaire or playboy or liar. The details of the 1920's are stellar: the clothes, the music, the glitter, the reckless abandon that affects everything. The cast is good, the acting fine but it's the story that carries it, at least for me. I must admit that I have read Fitzgerald's novel at least six times, the most recent about 8 months ago. It is, to me, an American classic about greed, indulgence, hope and despair and, most of all, misplaced love. I liked this movie version because it isn't as misty-eyed as the 1974 version with Robert Redford and this version has some grit to it. DiCaprio doesn't play Gatsby as a total pretty-boy but as a shrewd yet lost man. It is worth seeing.
Behind the Candelabra. I am probably the last person in Northern California to see this pseudo bio-pic of Liberace but, hey, better late than never. Michael Douglas, who knew he would be so good as the flaming piano playing queen? He's great. Matt Damon is good too, especially once he gets the face lift and his face is his own and he doesn't have to walk around with someone else's balloon face. Supposedly the movie is a fair representation of the relationship between the two. I didn't expect to like it as much as I did, which says something. I would definitely recommend it, as long as you aren't put off by the mincing quality of Liberace. It is sort of strange to see Michael Douglas without hair, I must say.
Searching for Sugar Man: if you like music and like documentaries, you will like this movie. It's a winner: a very good young Bob Dylan-type musician in the 1960-70 era gets good press but no one buys his albums After a while he gives up and goes back to construction work. Click ahead 20 plus years and someone realizes that all this time he has a huge following in South Africa. People are contacted, plans are made, flights taken and he ends up, in his late 40's, in South Africa, playing to SRO audiences. This is a true "Cinderella" tale, about a humble man who simply goes along for the ride. And then simply goes back home, back to his real life. See it. You will love it.
Before Midnight: in 1995 there was a small film, Before Sunrise about two young people who meet on a train in Europe and fall in love for one night, knowing that they will probably never see each other. In 2004 there was a small film, Before Sunset, that has those same two people meeting up somewhat accidentally in Paris, ten years later, and they sort of fall in love again. Now, in 2013, 9 years later, Before Midnight has them married with two kids and facing that place in a marriage where it can go either way: leave or stay. Stay or leave. If you haven't seen the first two of this trio, this one might not mean much to you. But then again, what happens in this one, Before Midnight, pretty much happens to all relationships: storms prevail, sometimes rough seas last for a long time, sometimes calmer seas smooth things over. These three movies are all dialogue. Ethan Hawke and Julie Delphy are great, as is their director, Richard Linklater. Hawke and Delphy are as natural a couple as two people from different countries and backgrounds can be and a lot of their dialogue is spontaneous. Having been married a couple times and having been through those prevailing storms, I found this movie true and honest in how mates treat each other and how they try even when they don't want to, or how they don't try when they think they should. I liked it a lot. It's not for everyone, but if you like honest movies with little action and a lot of talk, you might like it.
OK, those are my picks of the week. Thank you, public library, for free DVDs.
The Great Gatsby. This is the new one from 2013 with Leonardo DiCaprio, directed by Baz Luhrmann. If you know anything about Baz Luhrmann's direction (Moulin Rouge, Australia) you know that he goes in for the theatrical, the visually intriguing, the "over the top" details. He spares nothing in this version of the story of Jay Gatsby, millionaire or playboy or liar. The details of the 1920's are stellar: the clothes, the music, the glitter, the reckless abandon that affects everything. The cast is good, the acting fine but it's the story that carries it, at least for me. I must admit that I have read Fitzgerald's novel at least six times, the most recent about 8 months ago. It is, to me, an American classic about greed, indulgence, hope and despair and, most of all, misplaced love. I liked this movie version because it isn't as misty-eyed as the 1974 version with Robert Redford and this version has some grit to it. DiCaprio doesn't play Gatsby as a total pretty-boy but as a shrewd yet lost man. It is worth seeing.
Behind the Candelabra. I am probably the last person in Northern California to see this pseudo bio-pic of Liberace but, hey, better late than never. Michael Douglas, who knew he would be so good as the flaming piano playing queen? He's great. Matt Damon is good too, especially once he gets the face lift and his face is his own and he doesn't have to walk around with someone else's balloon face. Supposedly the movie is a fair representation of the relationship between the two. I didn't expect to like it as much as I did, which says something. I would definitely recommend it, as long as you aren't put off by the mincing quality of Liberace. It is sort of strange to see Michael Douglas without hair, I must say.
Searching for Sugar Man: if you like music and like documentaries, you will like this movie. It's a winner: a very good young Bob Dylan-type musician in the 1960-70 era gets good press but no one buys his albums After a while he gives up and goes back to construction work. Click ahead 20 plus years and someone realizes that all this time he has a huge following in South Africa. People are contacted, plans are made, flights taken and he ends up, in his late 40's, in South Africa, playing to SRO audiences. This is a true "Cinderella" tale, about a humble man who simply goes along for the ride. And then simply goes back home, back to his real life. See it. You will love it.
Before Midnight: in 1995 there was a small film, Before Sunrise about two young people who meet on a train in Europe and fall in love for one night, knowing that they will probably never see each other. In 2004 there was a small film, Before Sunset, that has those same two people meeting up somewhat accidentally in Paris, ten years later, and they sort of fall in love again. Now, in 2013, 9 years later, Before Midnight has them married with two kids and facing that place in a marriage where it can go either way: leave or stay. Stay or leave. If you haven't seen the first two of this trio, this one might not mean much to you. But then again, what happens in this one, Before Midnight, pretty much happens to all relationships: storms prevail, sometimes rough seas last for a long time, sometimes calmer seas smooth things over. These three movies are all dialogue. Ethan Hawke and Julie Delphy are great, as is their director, Richard Linklater. Hawke and Delphy are as natural a couple as two people from different countries and backgrounds can be and a lot of their dialogue is spontaneous. Having been married a couple times and having been through those prevailing storms, I found this movie true and honest in how mates treat each other and how they try even when they don't want to, or how they don't try when they think they should. I liked it a lot. It's not for everyone, but if you like honest movies with little action and a lot of talk, you might like it.
OK, those are my picks of the week. Thank you, public library, for free DVDs.
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