Who would have thought a fire would last this long? But then, who would have imagined a fire that could take out more than a thousand homes in a couple of hours?
Day ten, brother Steve can finally be in his house tonight, safely. He has water and power, the air is relatively clear, it's a day to sit on the porch and toast the fates that his house made it through unscathed. There are thousands who still cannot get to their homes or to where their homes once stood. Thousands still in shelters. And thousands who are going to have a long, hard road back, no homes, no jobs, for many, nothing left of the life they knew on Sunday afternoon, October 8.
Even for those of us who lost nothing except some sleep, it's been unsettling (duh, to put it mildly) and physically confusing. "Why am I so tired, I did so little today?" One moment you feel so lucky and so comforted by your own bed and five minutes later you have to pull over to the side of the road because you can't see to drive with all those tears streaming out of your eyes. You have no appetite but you want to eat a pint of ice cream and then you want someone to make you spaghetti and meatballs, which you don't even like. You want to cook for someone (lucky I had Steve to fulfill that need) and then you want someone to cook for you (and I had a family of people who wanted to feed us.) It's so _______ fill in the blank. Actually, fill in the many blanks. How you feel, how you think (or can't), how sad you are for the people you know and the thousands you don't, how relieved, exhausted, guilty, alive, zombie-like, dull, aware, and overwhelmed. So many blanks, so many adjectives and adverbs and some words that probably haven't even been invented yet.
Plus, thinking about all those who are dealing with the loss of everything. I sat in the Honda dealership today to remedy a recall on my car and there were a lot of people buying cars! At first I thought "How can you buy a car at a time like this?" and then I thought "Oh, if your car was melted in the fire, of course you will buy a new car because you need one." Maybe that wasn't the case, but maybe it was. It's probably just one more element in the ongoing slog to try to get back to a point where you can move forward.
I have little (or no) work now, but I have time. I have signed up with the Redwood Empire Food Bank to help organize food products in their warehouse. It's an ongoing organization, so it's not only for the evacuees but for anyone who needs food. I will try and sign up for other volunteer positions as well. The local businesses and restaurants and retail places have been very generous so far and I hope that continues. Santa Rosa JC is giving out free boxed dinners tonight, to anyone, even if you aren't a firefighter or an evacuee, even if you are just tired and need someone to cook for you. Generosity prevails.
Again, anyone who reads this blog, please give something. Redwood Credit Union is handling tons of donations and they are charging no administration fee, all the money goes to those who need it. Even $25 makes a difference. If you read this, it means you have a computer or a phone, it means you have power. It means you can give $25. Here's the story. https://www.cuinsight.com/press-release/redwood-credit-union-creates-north-bay-fire-relief-fund
If you can't access that, let me know and I can make sure you can give something. Give some money to the Redwood Empire Food Bank, you can donate online. Buy some gift cards (or just one) to Safeway or Target or anyplace someone can buy food or clothes. Send them to the Santa Rosa Fire Department, you can google them for the address.
OK, that's all for now. Thank you for helping Sonoma County and thank you for reading this blog. Be thankful and happy you are whole. Be kind.
xo
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