The Case of the Mysterious Bed Sheets

One of you out there must have some inside knowledge of this mysterious situation. I feel like Hercule Poirot should be involved but it is probably much simpler than what it seems.

An unexpected package arrived on my doorstep this morning, in a familiar Amazon box.  (Right there, that sentence, could be the start of a great mystery!  Or not.) Did I order something from them that I neglected to remember?  As far as my feeble mind knows, the last thing I procured was dog food.  Hmmm.....  I gingerly picked up the box and carefully brought it into my kitchen.  (If it was going to explode, I would have been toast on the porch, so the careful part was gratuitous, I suppose.)

I grabbed a knife. I opened the package.  And Zut Alors!  Inside was a set of white cotton sheets! And they were the correct size for my small non-queen bed! 

Now I was puzzled.  I did spend some time last week looking at sheets online, visiting a couple of sites that had cheap sheets for sale, but I had no memory of actually ordering any cheap sheets (or non cheap sheets either) and thus I was a bit stymied.  I searched the Amazon box for  a print-out of the purchase but there was nothing!  Even more confusing because Amazon always includes too much annoying paperwork.

But I needed sheets, there was  no question about that. I had been using the same set of sheets for the last three years, over and over, and about three weeks ago one of those sheets just gave up the ghost, just fell apart,  disintegrated in front of me. However, in my quest to Not Buy Anything New, I refrained from getting new sheets, resorting to using a king sized sheet that was previously used as a dog sheet for our couch and it was fine as the tucked in bottom sheet on my bed.  I washed it, of course, in case you were wondering.

But as I said, I needed sheets. I ruminated about this for a while and then figured it was a gift from the gods or from a friend or was a mistake or honestly, who cared.  I washed the new sheets, they are now on my bed, and tonight I will sleep on them, new sheets!!! 

It has been a long, long time since I have had new sheets. The ones I have been sleeping on for the last three years were from my friend Martha, who was killed three years ago this month. When we cleared out her apartment, I took the sheets. But before that, I cannot remember when I last bought sheets, so these, these stranger sheets, these sheets of unknown origin, are very welcomed.

Whoever you are, thank  you.  I will buy you dinner next week if you own up to it.  I will buy you dinner next week even if you don't own up to it. If I can figure out who you are, that is.....

ah, new sheets.  how nice.

xo.