Oh, nothing has changed. The stupid asshole renter has not shown his face. Tomorrow I will contact the Monterey County Sheriff Department and see if they have arrested him or found him dead somewhere, since the last thing he said to me was he was driving his wreck of a car to Monterey. He has seemingly vanished from regular radar. I cannot find anything online about him.
This entire situation has made me doubt myself, my intuition, my mind, my emotions, everything. I am in denial, of course. My solution is to simply read a book and not address the issue of my impending homelessness. (I have read three books in the last 5 days. One has to love that kind of denial.) It turns out I am responsible for all of the rent for June, a huge amount that I cannot afford, but the law is the law, so no arguing with that fact.
Move or stay. Stay or go. Go where? Stay how? In my 65 years I have encountered lots of stuff, raised kids, had a couple of divorces, gotten laid off, fired, had to sell my home, on and on, but I have no resources within myself to deal with this. Time is of the essence here because my landlord has a healthy deposit of mine and I can't afford to lose that. I can't just move out, I need a plan. And I am having a difficult time coming up with that plan. I simply do not know what to do.
Yes, in some fashion, it will all come together and be fine. At this moment, however, I do not know what that fashion entails. And things seem far from fine.
But hey, at least I don't have head lice this week. And I have a roof over my head. Albeit I pay for that roof, but it's there. And when I flush the toilet, poop goes away! Small graces, I guess.
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